changes in attitude and the cold

the power of focus

The major story today, Christmas Eve’s Eve, is the brutal cold numbing so much of the United States and Canada. When one hears about warnings in Florida that iguanas start falling out of trees at 40 degree F so people need be on alert, it gets one’s attention. The costs of pipes breaking from frozen water will be astronomical and the rise in temper tantrums resulting from cancelled flights and traffic jams in icy conditions is testing the patience of calmest among us. This doesn’t even address the heating bills, already inflated substantially over last year due to the costs of various supplies, which will skyrocket even further, perilously stressing those on fixed incomes who have few choices to address the basic needs. Heavens, could it be any worse?

North America is a vast, often frigid place in the winter and broiling in the summer. Living in many parts of this continent presents a challenge that we take for granted because we do it all the time but that is because we have chosen to focus on the days that don’t bother us much. I choose to live here, even though I suppose I could go elsewhere.

How did it work for those who came before us? Our forebearers did not have the weather television and internet warning them days in advance of deteriorating conditions. They tracked signs of animal behaviour but largely had too much going on in the grind of their daily lives to angst about these things. Many of them put their faith in their abilities to ride out storms and to solve problems. These could be excess heat, sleet, high humidity, hurricanes, gales, or drought. Some years things went terribly wrong and these people lost their herds and occasionally family members. They adjusted. But, they were hearty individuals who came to this country seeking better lives or in many cases simply seeking to survive which conditions in their prior homes might not allow. Sure, some were unsuccessful but most hung in whether in Philadelphia, Minot, or Meridian. They chose to focus on what they had power to control in most cases, acting to fix what they could.

Many of us reading this are lucky enough to sit today in well-insulated homes with heating cranked up, wearing polar tech clothing, watching the snow fall outside, and kvetching about how awful it is. That is our choice.

Businesses are disappointed these temperatures will keep people at home. Many consumers will exercise the option of foregoing shopping just this year for safety or comfort. Those poor sales will hit some stores hard but people are exercising a choice in how they want to retain comfort.

Public safety personnel are likely relieved fewer folks will be out after dark when frozen sidewalks could lead to unlucky falls which could (absolute worst case) result in broken bones or hypothermia. Restaurants and bars will be disappointed but overworked staff in a period of personnel shortages will rue the loss of income while welcoming the time to recoup their strength. Roads will still snarl with those shoppers and workers who must be out but the numbers likely will be smaller than the years when we see above average temperatures—and complaints about non-white Christmases. People may be disappointed but, upon reflection, may choose to find some positives in this state of affairs. (I would not, however, want to be the parent with four kids sleeping on the floor at O’Hare for three nights so there is no way to gussy up that one)

I am one of the luckiest people in the world as I have a warm home, can shift around how we prioritise paying heating bills above virtually anything else, sit with a hot water bottle by my side most days of winter (no, I do not kid. Hot water bottles are woefully underappreciated as a daily comfort), and food to give our cats who do not face the horrible cold. I deliberately try to find a more positive way to look at things when I think of what others confront or have confronted in the past. I have power over some things and it’s incumbent on me to exercise it rather than kvetch about things.

I did not always approach life this way. As more than one person told me over the years, I was the most negative person one could meet. If there was a negative perspective, I was bound to look for and find it. Watching the weather channel, as if I could change the horrible forecast, was a luxury that cable television allowed me to get worked up for hours and hours. And to what end? Was I going to control the bad forecast? If I had to go to work, didn’t I still have to go to work?

Several years ago I came across a book on gratitude which completely changed my view. I realised I truly had the power to be less chronically looking for the downside. It was amazing I had as many friends as I did because I had taken them for granted and they probably felt that way. That meant I had the power to change how I interacted with them as well.

Do I always succeed at focusing on what I can change? Nope, far from it. I still wallow with the best of them in self-pity. But, I have a better chance of pulling myself out of it when I ask what I can do to change a situation. If there is an answer, let’s apply it. Then we can look at things again

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So, I sit here finishing these thoughts today incredibly appreciative of what I have, things my forebearers did not. It turned from a dreary, warmish, rainy, yucky morning into a gloriously sunny, windy, cold afternoon but that was spectacularly beautiful. The lack of boats on the Creek made me focus on the colours and openness. I am just so thankful to focus on what great things I have.

BE CAREFUL OUT THERE. This is a major storm and I am NOT denying that. I am also worried about those who face the cold, the fury of the elements, and the challenges this creates. TAKE the STEPS YOU NEED to and call for help if you need it. I just know I need lighten up on negative because I don’t have it nearly as bad as some of you. FIN